When the day comes… I want you to know that you will not die in me or who to “continue” me

anxiety. The wait for a result. Someone we love threatened by a diagnosis that scares. The heart tightens, the eyes are pale with fear, glossy tears. The body freezes. You don't want to lose who loves.

You wonder: Who has I been for the people I love?

For whom and what have I invested my time and energy?

These are some questions that “take us” when we reevaluate our values, when we think about what really matters. Having someone we love too much receiving a difficult diagnosis gives a rock. Balanced “good” - of those that makes us wonder if this other has an idea of how valuable his life is to us. How much we love him and want it well. Those shakes that remind us to make more affection, to ask if it's okay, if you need something, how we can help. To make ourselves present because the other is a gift to us.

This is her. I want to serve warm tea and take it to her on the couch. I want to heat her feet with my lap, a blanket and a affection. I want to spare her from homework. Of the things that are boring to her. I want to relieve any “physical” discomfort or pain that may be there, with my love and my presence. I want to make room for her to talk and to silence her pain. I want to be a lap and continent for whatever it is. For what she needs. I want to be for her a little of what it was and what is for me. When the day comes… I want you to know that you will not die in me or who to “continue me”.

Glad we can recognize value and love. That we can show. That we can make all this we feel and make the other "know that is loved." Glad we can see all that when it's okay.

Being aware of the other's “size” in our life regardless of threats to their physical integrity is a blessing. Thank you conscience, thank you attention, thank you my 5 senses and my emotions. Knowing yourself happy and knowing yourself by loving who loves are blessings.

From the theoretical point of view, we can say that this text dialogues with acceptance and commitment therapy, which works with psychological flexibility, with our ability to live a life that makes sense despite the pain that composes it. There are 6 central processes: awareness of the present moment, values, actions with commitment, self such as context, disregard and acceptance, which in this text are “tangent”:

Consciousness of the present moment: Knowing that life is now - to notice the present emotions, to observe the experience with our 5 senses.

Values: Who is what really matters to me? What makes all worth it?

actions with commitment: things we do to value and that is valuable. In this text, what we do to take care of those we love.

self as context: Knowing that we are more than what we think of us.

Defusion: Realize that we think are thoughts.

Acceptance: About what we cannot change.

That we can live “whole” the plenituity of relationships.