Good reasons to take distance from thoughts!

We are often distressed, sad, even angry with thoughts on a particular theme, which are fixed and multiply in our minds. There are several consequences beyond malaise, such as insomnia or behavior we regret later. We can say that it is fused with these thoughts and sensations. For example, if a person has gone through a betrayal in a previous relationship, he may be fused with the idea that “everyone cheats on” and having the urge to pursue his current partner in an attempt to avoid further suffering.

The alternative would be the dismissal, that is, to undo the bond or fusion that connects us with unwanted thoughts that limit our development. Luoma, Hayes & Walser (2007) define the dismissal as a process of creating non -literal contexts in which language can be seen as an active, continuous and relational process, which is historical by nature and present at the moment. It is to develop a more flexible way to relate to thoughts, feelings, sensations and memories, rather than trying to change or avoid its content, weakening the dodge function of aversive verbal events.

All this because we give a thought of the nature of the truth, thinking that the constant stories we tell ourselves are faithful to reality. We "merged" with these thoughts and beliefs, as if they were absolute truths. Believing literally in the narratives we build based on our unfortunate life experience can lead us to self -destructive, inflexible and harmful behaviors. It also leads us to create rules that tell us how to "we must" act or be in certain situations.

The invitation is to recognize that thoughts are just that: simple thoughts. In this terrain of convictions and narratives that cognitive discharge plays an important role as a way of detaching ourselves from our thoughts, specifically from those who have become a problem. What cognitive discharge seeks to help us interact with these types of thoughts.

With these strategies we have learned to observe products and thought processes as they are. For example: “I am having the thought…”, “With this thought I am feeling…”. The goal is to distinguish between mental activity, ourselves and reality and thus obtain perspective from thoughts. Cognitive discharge is not intended to change dysfunctional thoughts (as cognitive restructuring would do, for example), but to help us understand that what we think is not always true or inevitable. In addition, it helps to reduce the influence of thoughts on our behaviors and experiences and, consequently, facilitate psychological flexibility.

There are some techniques of dismissal to facilitate the observation of thoughts. As an example, the enunciation of a thought to disassociate something, knowing this and recognize its existence, that is, to accept it. For example, I can have the thought: "I am incompetent" or observe it with perspective, as "I am having the thought that I am incompetent." This separates us from thought, as it is no longer something we are, but a thought we have. Another way would be to see thoughts from a broader perspective to broaden our point of view. For example, we can try to think from an opposite point of view to ours, as if they were someone else. Even more, there are skills learned from mindfulness or full attention, which help training attention, which facilitates cognitive discharge, improving observation capacity, facilitating a less emotional response to internal and external experiences and changing styles repetitive behavior that paralyze. Finally, when we can observe our narratives and thoughts for what they are, mere ideas in our mind, we have the possibility to do with better perspective, clarity and, consequently, make more functional choices for our lives.

Text written by the member of the Contextus Mara Lins Nucleus